Self Sabotage No More.
Welcome back!
Last Monday I wrote about my family friend Emma Self Sabotage to stay safe!? Emma is a person whom use self sabotage to keep herself from ever have a chance to have success. Emma has been doing this her entire life and last week was the first time Emma openly admitted that self sabotage was indeed what she has been doing in order to stay safe and never having to risk the possibility of failure.
Last week Emma and I came to this core discovery and understood that this is why she has never achieved her dream due to herself sabotage. That was the end of our talk, we departed on that note and we were to talk again in a week.
The past week was an important week for Emma and I resisted contacting her to try to talk her into things. I gave her the space to do the much needed thinking. Emma had to decide if she was going to face her fear get to the bottom of her sabotage or to keep living life as she knows it. I knew that if she doesn’t call, then that would mean she isn’t willing to work on her fears yet. And if she call than our work will begin… So I have been waiting to exhale sort of speak, waiting till Monday.
Today at 1:00 the phone ring and it is Emma. So we begin our work together; we start to look at what is her definition of success. This will allow us to know what we are shooting for. Not surprisingly Emma has no idea of what success is for her. To her success is list of thing that she doesn’t have or may never have (because some of which are unrealistic). No wonder Emma was afraid to try, she would have been going after a goal that she could never reach. You can’t get what you are after; if you don’t know what it is that you are after?
“Success - To laugh often and much; to win the respect of intelligent people and the affection of children; to earn the appreciation of honest critics and endure the betrayal of false friends; to appreciate beauty; to find the best in others; to leave the world a bit better, whether by a healthy child, a garden patch or a redeemed social condition; to know even one life has breathed easier because you have lived; this is to have succeeded.”
By Ralph Waldo Emerson
While Emma is thinking about what success is to her, what is your definition of success?
Giovanna Garcia
Imperfect Action is better than No Action.
Other post by Giovanna
Face your fear! You will to be rewarded.
How to make a decision in 2 second?
![Reblog this post [with Zemanta]](http://img.zemanta.com/reblog_e.png?x-id=db368573-220e-4ceb-9480-a37ec0f99529)
Hi Gio .. success for me would be to be free - to be able to enjoy life, help others, travel, be able to relate to all and be involved in & benefiting life in general.
I look forward to seeing what your readers say .. thanks & I’m sure Emma will help herself with your guidance ..
Hilary: Be Positive Be Happy
Hi Hilary
Thank you for sharing your idea of Success with us.
Giovanna Garcia
Imperfect Action is better than No Action
For me personally, success is living my life the way I want to live it, in all ways. Like I always say, a half lived life is like a half sung song. Even the singer wouldn’t like that. So dying with my music still inside me, is not acceptable to me.
By the way, I like what you are doing with Emma. Even if you have inspired one person in life, you have contributed.
Success is different for each of us and it is a moving target. I define success daily and in different ways as it relates to which hat I am wearing. Success at work is different than success in my love life or success with family or success in writing, etc.
The quote that you provided is a favorite of mine, it was penned by Ralph Waldo Emerson.
I’m a fan of defining tests for success. I keep a bit of agility in my goals and results. I practice The Rule of 3. For example, each day I define 3 tests for success (3 outcomes). I do this for the day, the week, the month, and the year. If I finish the 3 I can add more, but 3 helps me scope and see the forest from the trees.
Hi Sunny
“Not to die with the music still inside…” That is beautiful
That is sort of my motto too, use it all up before I go. Thank you for the kind words about me and Emma. Yes, if I made a different in one person than I know I did some good 
Thank you for your comment and support.
Giovanna Garcia
Imperfect Action is better than No Action
HI Mark
Really, I didn’t know whom that quote was from. I found it a lot time ago and it had no name attached, and I have kept it cause I love it. Thank you for letting know about Emerson. It does sound like something that he would write
Thank you for your comment and sharing your wisdom with us.
Giovanna Garcia
Imperfect Action is better than No Action
Hi J.D.
I love the idea of 3 :-), that is a great one. And I love testing, I see my life as a test lab.
Thank you for your comment and sharing your wisdom of 3 with us.
Giovanna Garcia
Imperfect Action is better than No Action
My definition of success is happiness. A happy person is a successful person.
Hi Giovanna, The idea of self-sabotage is interesting, because it really doesn’t make sense. Why would someone want to stop themselves from succeeding, and, yet, we do it all the time. I don’t consider success to be something that is static, I think it’s a changing picture for everyone. But I think my definition of success is to do the things I love every day and to be around the people I love everyday. That’s what I walk towards, but the possibilities are really endless. Thanks!
Success for me is going to bed every night ready to meet my Maker because I have lived well that day.
Success is happiness and defining happiness is being well adjusted and having the acheiving of goals in your life and not the acheivement of goals. You are always looking ahead to your next goal even before you are finish in what your goal is now and let there be an ultimate goal in your life that you can not reach until after your death. Success and happiness is looking thru the windshield of life and not looking in the rear view mirror of what ifs..
Hi Vered
Happiness is a must
We can never be successful if we are not happy.
Thank you for your comment and sharing your idea of success.
Giovanna Garcia
Imperfect Action is better than No Action
Hi Amanda
Love is the center. With love on our side we can do anything!
Thank you for your comment and sharing your wisdom of success.
Giovanna Garcia
Imperfect Action is better than No Action
Hi Daphne
So simple… yet it is also loud and clear. Thank you for sharing your wisdom with us.
Giovanna Garcia
Imperfect Action is better than No Action
Hi John
I love how you said: “Success and happiness is looking thru the windshield of life and not looking in the rear view mirror of what ifs..” Well said.
Thank you for your comment and sharing your thoughts with us.
Giovanna Garcia
Imperfect Action is better than No Action