The magic of Asking.
Welcome back!
The Magic of Asking
Most of us have heard of the saying “Ask and you shall receive.” With that knowledge in us, the question of the day is “Are you asking the right question?”
I was on the phone with Jody yesterday, and she said, “Why can’t I make connection with the right kind of people?” Before I could get a word in, she continued by saying: “I think I am just the types that don’t attract winners…” Naturally, I asked her where she goes to met people. She replied with: “I don’t go to Business Networking event; I don’t go to Meet Up. I don’t get out much because I never meet the right people!”
What would you tell Jody to help her situation?
May be if Jody starts asking the question of: “How can I meet the right kind of people?” Or “Where can I meet the right kind of people?” Jody would get the answer in ‘How to’ and ‘Where to’ go about meeting the right kind of folks.
Instead Jody asked “Why can’t I …” so her brain answers right back with why she is meeting the wrong people, which serves no purpose for her in her goal to making connection with her target group and ultimately causing her to stop getting out all together in order to prevent herself from meeting the wrong target market, leaving her no chance of reaching any market at all.
Lisa on the other hand is a woman who wishes to start an online woman’s networking group for home school moms. And she asked the questions of: “Where and how can I find home school moms?” Lisa started to tell everyone she met that: “I am starting an online women’s networking group for Home School Moms, and where do you think I can find more of them? How can I reach more home school moms?
It is because Lisa is asking the right questions, she is getting more and more creative daily as to where and how to find more home school moms. Lisa’s membership numbers are growing consistently and people who are not home school mom are sending her referral of home school mom that they know.
What can we learn from the two women?
When asking a question, always think of the answer you want first; then plan your question before you ask. Ask for what you want; don’t ask for what you don’t want. For example: “Why can’t I meet more home school mom?” is not the kind of question that would get Lisa what she wants. “Where are all the home school moms? Where do they hang out and how can I reach them?” Those are the kind of questions that would deliver result for Lisa.
Take a moment to think about what you are after? Start by asking the right question, the kind that would give you the result you are seeking.
There are magic in the asking, use is wisely.
Giovanna Garcia
Imperfect Action is better than No Action
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Hi Giovanna,
It is profound article. I think the people ask “Why can’t I …” have some certain emotion of frustration “why it does not go the way I wish.” It does not solve the puzzle. As you point out we should ask “how” or “when” to get constructive answer.
Thank you for your sharing.
Shaw Funami
Fill the Missing Link
Hi Giovanna,
I just found your blog through Daphne at Joyful Days. Her post on a message from your older self has inspired me to write mine.
You make a very important point in this post about the kinds of questions we ask ourselves. It’s so true that the answers we get are dependent on the questions, so it’s important to frame them as positively as possible.
By the way, I also love your tagline: Imperfect action is better than no action! That’s great!!
Hi Gio .. somehow Jody needs to look at herself .. she needs to realise she needs to change .. she can only start with tiny steps - and start smiling all the time .. even when she’s talking to someone ..
Lisa has a passion and a goal and a reason to move forward and she has a unique idea to connect with local people, who feel the same need .. so her connections should be reasonably easy; she appears open, easy to talk to, wouldn’t worry if someone wasn’t too keen, or said ‘no’ for the moment ..
Jody - perhaps needs to be sent off in the direction of some of the wonderful blogs you’ve connected with - to get a feel of how others feel ..
Thanks Gio -
Hilary Melton-Butcher
Positive Letters
Perfect! “Why can’t I…” is a negative. It puts a negative picture that you can’t into your non-conscious mind and you get more of that picture - you can’t.
Thanks for sharing!
I have a book that I pick up from time to time when I need a pick me up in the question department, “The Answer to How is Yes” by Peter Block. The point is it is in how you ask the question. So true. These are great examples.
Hi Giovanna - really good points - we don’t want to ruin our chances of getting answers before we even start! I watched your video on your home page - I thought it was great and I love your message!
Yes, there is an art to asking questions. We get what we ask for, we simply need to make sure we are asking the right question and that it is framed correctly. Some people don’t ask the question at all, they make a statement like “I am hungry” or “I need money”, these are not questions yet some people act as though they are. Some people frame the question in a negative way like “You don’t have any money you could loan me do you?” or “You wouldn’t want to go out with me would you?. Of course you have just set yourself up for a negative response. Once we do learn to ask the right questions in the right way we then have to be very careful what we ask for because we will probably get it.
Hi Hilda,
http://www.facebook.com/group.php?gid=44798079143
That is great! I am glad you enjoyed the post, and that it is inpring you to write! This is music to my ears.
You should join my Facebook group. I would love to learn to get to know you better.
Giovanna Garcia
Imperfect Action is better than no Action
Hi Hilary,
Thank you for your words and you comment. It really means a lot to me to have support from kind people such as you.
I hope you have a wonderful weekend.
Take care,
Giovanna Garcia
Imperfect Action is better than no Action
Hi Stephen,
You are absoluetly right….saying I cant is like automatically assuming that something can’t be done. Where is the positive in that?
I hope you have a wonderful weekend.
Giovanna Garcia
Imperfect Action is better than no Action
Hi Stacey
The more positvity the better.
If you we always thinking positive things, and asking positive questions…then our brains will get trained to think positve more and more.
Thank you for commenting and for sharing your thoughts.
I hope you have a wonderful weekend.
Giovanna Garcia
Imperfect Action is better than no Action
Hi Robin
Giovanna Garcia
Thanks for joining in the conversation and for sharing your thoughts. It means a lot to me.
I am glad you liked my message, and I hope you continue to be inspired.
Have a wonderful weekend.
Imperfect Action is better than no Action
Hi Mark
What we want and how we ask is key. There is an art to asking for things.
Like the old saying…be carefule what you wish for.
Thank you for sharing your thoughts with me. It means a lot to have support from kind people such as you.
I hope you are having a great day, and have a wonderful weekend.
Giovanna Garcia
Imperfect Action is better than no Action
Hmmmm - thanks for giving me something to think about.
Hi Christopher
Thank you for your comment and support.
Giovanna Garcia
Imperfect Action is better than No Action